....sigh...

I always ask our applicants..what are the most important things at work?

I am suddenly in that situation where I had to ask myself the same question...

My answer...

-Challenge
-Creativity
-Relationships
-Appreciation

At this point I guess I'm putting in renumeration... (always take into consideration the economic crisis)

quick somewhat-irrelevant thought---
What's worse than long painful death?
working for a short,arrogant,name-dropping,judgemental,insensitive,senior citizen boss?

Whenever I'm pissed at work, I immediately open my Jobstreet account and send a
dozen of applications...Then I miss 80% of the interviews and get creative with my excuses... Why oh why?

I think about burning my book, 'What color is your parachute' by Richard Bolles.
It was a gift from my uncle back when I was unemployed..for almost 3 years... This book is about skills, career management, happiness at work etc.

I hate my skills...

Things I'm never good at:

1. The details (I can't remember them...I easilly forget them..blame the anesthesia)
2. Numbers (I'll count bills over & over...)
3. Filing (is this something anybody should be good at?....)
4. Control (inventory...logistics...procedures??..I love to lose control..hehehe)

Why a career in Human Resources?
a not-so unique ability to understand individual behavior in a group setting...

I am in that rotten place where you find yourself stuck in something you can't get out of. Oh yeah, I now hear Bono singing.."you've got to get yourself together, you got stuck in the moment, & you can't get out of it.."
Worst part is that this is not just a "moment" thing, but almost like a lifetime of being stuck. "Infinistuck"...

My friend insisting that I'm in the wrong place...wrong job..wrong everything...
"Lusyang...hindi ka dapat HR. Wala kang pakialam sa mga yan. You hate the rules. You complain too much on everything..Hindi ka bagay dyan...

She's right...

Etc...

Store signs:

SCREW IT: The Bolts & Nuts store (along P.Tuazon Cubao)
GULONG NG BUHAY Vulcanizing - Molave Road, Marikina
ANG MANOK NI SAN PEDRO INIHAW (Barangka Marikina)
TALK DIRTY TO ME - Cleaning Services (Grove Los Banos)
OFIS NI KWAN - office supplies (Makati Cinema Square)
CRUSTY CLOUDS Internet Cafe - ???? konek!!
TONIO LABANDERO - Laundry services Marikina (kaw na maglaba honey ako magluluto)

SI KWAN???

Ofis ni Kwan Collection Rep at the reception area...
Collector: Maam collection po.
Me: Collection from?
Collector: Ofis ni Kwan po
Me: Office ni?
Collector: Ofis ni Kwan po
Me: Office nino nga??!! (taray)
Collector: Ofis ni Kwan
Me: Kwan?
Collector: Ofis ni Kwan po..
Me: Ahh!!! Ofis ni Kwan yung name..hehe
Collector: (pinapawisan)

MUNTING BUHANGIN BROCHURE:
Honeymoon Suite - Good for 5 -15 persons (wow! the more the merrier!!!)

EXCERPT:

"Thanks to Wireless Technology, I can hate my job anywhere"
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The Tree

Can't forget the story of Mang Tom from Calatagan about the Tree Poem
set up line by line along the main road from Nasugbu-Calatagan Batangas
back to Manila.

The young driver of a brand new Honda..reading the poem aloud to his girlfriend
as they pass by the signs...

"I think I shall never see...
A poem as lovely as a tree...
A tree whose hungry mouth is prest...
Against the earth's loving breast...

kablag!! car smashes to the next tree...
------------------------------------------------------------------

Open manhole sign along Kalayaan Makati - "Deep Shit"

Memorable Movie Quotes Vol. 2

A few important lines that sort of explains...why I love the movies...

SAVING PRIVATE RYAN
Private Reiben: You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy?
Captain Miller: Anyone wanna answer that?
Medic Wade: Hey, think about the poor bastard's mother.
Private Reiben: Hey, Wade, I got a mother, you got a mother, the sarge has got a mother. I'm willing to bet that even the Captain's got a mother. Well, maybe not the Captain, but the rest of us have got mothers.

Most apt title: Hating Private Ryan..

LOTR: RETURN OF THE KING
Aragorn: I summon you to fulfill your oath.
King of the Dead: None but the king of Gondor may command me.
[Swings sword; Aragorn blocks him with the sword of Anduril]
King of the Dead: The blade was broken
Aragorn: It has been remade.
Aragorn: Fight for us... and regain your honor.

ah yes, the moment I was waiting for...

Witch King: You fool. No man can kill me. Die now.
Eowyn: I am no man.

"I am ate guy..."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

GLADIATOR
Commodus: How dare you show your back to me! Slave, you will remove your helmet and tell me your name.
Maximus: [removes helmet and turns around to face Commodus] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

Real revenge...is Russel in a skirt
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BABE
Narrator: And though every single human in the stands or in the commentary boxes was at a complete loss for words, the man who in his life had uttered fewer words than any of them knew exactly what to say.
Farmer Hoggett: That'll do, pig. That'll do.

Had a hard time eating my porkchops after this..

Milestones

Dream wedding.. San Sebastian











Spending the rest of my life with my best friend














ETHAN









First Laugh!!













First Christmas!!










Ethan's first summer skinny dip...











Ethan's 1st Birthday









Ethan's first out-of-town trip...Calatagan!!

Recruitment Files Vol. 2 - TIPS

The interviewer observes the applicants every move... Fresh grads & first time applicants check the textbook Guide to Interviews... boys & girls..here are some tips not mentioned by your Career Guide or even your favorite Richard Bolles' "What Color is you Parachute" edition..

1. Know when to shut up.. As in..
Don't exagerrate.
Don't give too many opinions.
Never give unsolicited comments.
Don't give a bad rap about your former employer.
Don't talk too much.
Never ever..butt in.

2. Focus. This is not the time to daydream.
3. Don't stare like you're posessed. This will creep out your interviewer.
Make eye contact, but don't overdo it.
3. Sit properly. This is a job interview. Not therapy.
4. Act like a pro. This is not star search, star in a million or abs-cbn
talent search. We are not after your rapping skills, ya know.
5. Limit the "ya know what I mean.." phrase. Its annoying enough when J.Lo uses it.
6. Don't raise your eyebrows...(wag na magtaray please... leave the pagtataray to me)
7. Again this is not therapy. I don't care about your problems.
8. The interviewer is looking for confidence..not overconfidence, and definitely not arrogance. (Oh please, I'm from UP too...so save it!)
9. Don't speak too loud. You are not applying for the PEP squad.
10. No sales talk please. (I am not buying magnetic shoe pads..)

The Mini..

Last week a sleek blue Mini stopped beside me while on traffic. I'm not a big fan of small automobiles that cause claustrophobia but my interest suddenly shifted from the cumbersome SUV to the real star of the movie Italian Job. I figured this movie was made for the Mini...especially since Mark Whalberg didn't do much for it. Europeans love the Mini because of its power & its practicality to the narrow streets of Euroupe. Entirely different to the Americans love for Maybachs, Escalades & Fords. The best & most comfortable way to get them thru different states and huge freeways.
We pinoys on the other hand, are so into the aesthetics of impractical automobiles. Like rap stars who collect, trade & upgrade the symbol for success & power. Now if I were single, rich, Sean Puffy Combs ex-gf..I would take the Mini. Easier to park parallel & in between the F150 and Navigator along Daang Bakal. Much easier to traverse thru EDSA traffic..Will be a problem though trying to fit all my chain-smoking friends inside.

Memorable Movie Quotes... Vol 1

Spaceballs
Dark Helmet: Before you die there is something you should know about us, Lone Star.
Lone Starr: What?
Dark Helmet: I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
Lone Starr: What's that make us?
Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing! Which is what you are about to become

Silence of the Lambs
Hannibal Lecter: A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory
Willy Wonka: You can't have your family hanging over you like an old, dead goose. No offense.
Grandpa George: None taken. Jerk.

Recruitment Files

Was chatting with a friend about publishing my experiences interviewing people for the "new" company I'm currently working for. I'll share them with anyone who wants a good laugh..

Me: What motivates you at work?
Applicant: Love songs! Because I am always in love. Even without a boyfriend!! (kinikilig)
Me: (Kinikilig sa inis)

Me: ..so what are your plans now?
Applicant: (sigh) eto..nag-aaply...
(Hay sorry hija, na-abala ba kita at nag-aaply ka dito?)

Me: What factors will make you decide whether to accept the offer or not?
Applicant: Accept.

Me: Undergrad course mo yun right?
Applicant: Maam graduate na po ako. (naiinis pa)

Accounting applicant in psychedelic shirt: Well..ya know, I've experience in account payables & receivables. That's my thing.. ya know.
Me: yo!

Receptionist applicant: I believe I can do everything & anything I want to do to the best of my abilities..as long as I am told what to do.

Me: So what can you contribute to the company?
Applicant w/ american accent: Maam I have excellent communication skills. I do outbond & inbound calls. Communication is my strength...and I know I can do a lot for your call center.
Me: We're not a call center.
Applicant: Ah ok. Isn't this Contact Point?
Me: (Dyos me!)